Disgrace is ignoring or turning from God’s grace.

At the time of Last Supper Jesus announced:
The Son of Man will go just as it is written about him. But woe to that man who betrays the Son of Man! It would be better for him if he had not been born. Matthew 26:24

Judas walked with Jesus.
He talked with Jesus.
He witnessed the miracles of Jesus.
He was chosen by Jesus.
Yet he betrayed Jesus and ran off in shame. In trying to undo what he had done, he turned away from God’s grace in Jesus and punished himself.

Peter walked with Jesus.
He talked with Jesus,
He witnessed miracles by Jesus
He was chosen by Jesus.
Yet he betrayed Jesus 3 times and ran off in shame. In time, Peter humbly turned from his failure to receive God’s grace in Jesus.

The difference between them is Peter chose to humble himself, and Judas chose to punish himself.

Woe to those who refuse to admit their need.
Ignoring the cross, where Christ did bleed.
Bemoaning their failure, counting their dross.
Too proud to bow before the cross.
This eulogy of the forlorn…
Better off to had never been born.

There is something more terrible than all your shame, and that is trying to live with it.