Depression (meditation on Psalm 139)

Clouds Obscure My Vision

All my thoughts are gray.
I am lost in despondency.
I cannot move for the weight of my darkness.
O Lord, You search for me, because You care for me.
I make my bed in Sheol.
Behold, You are here with me.
You stoop down to meet me, because You love me.
You come along side me, because of Your great compassion.
You understand how I feel, because You walked these paths.
You cry with me and do not run out of tears.
This gray day has been known by You since I was first made,
Its purpose is not lost, because You are with me.
Your compassion for me will never end; it will never grow old.
You surround me and have laid Your hand upon me.
I scarcely understand.
Though I forsake myself, You will not.
And someday, I will enter Your rest,
Because Your grip is sure and You know the way.

Beyond My Wildest Dreams

Forest Light

Dreaming in the forest

“No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him”   1 Corinthians 2:9

The question is how do I love God? I know from Deuteronomy 6:5 that I am told to love God with everything in me. But how do I do that?

To understand how, keep reading in 1 Corinthians 2.

“But God has revealed it to us by His Spirit.”  1 Corinthians 2:10

I can’t of myself truly love GodI need the help of the Holy Spirit. To receive that help all I need to do is ask and receive as His child. And what I receive is beyond my wildest dreams. To be loved by God and walk with my Lord.

Killing Time Till I Die

Crystal clear water of Iceberg Creek

Crystal clear water of Iceberg Creek

This stream coming down from Iceberg Lake reminds me of a hiker I met on that trail. He had diabetes and lived out of his car. He had a little money saved, and with it was able to buy gas, food, and insulin. Stopping at various camp grounds his days were spent hiking the trails of national parks. As we hiked and talked he spoke of the many regrets in his life. He really wanted to do something meaningful, something to make his life worthwhile. After a pause he woefully admitted: “Right now I’m just killing time ‘till I die.”

How sad to wander through life with such an epithet. It made me think of my own life. How do I avoid falling prey to similar regrets? The pursuit of what seems worthwhile, only to find in the end that it is mirage, empty of any lasting purpose.

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.  John 10:10

In truth there is a spiritual battle going on. One side wants to steal and make my life worthless — “killing time, ‘till I die.” On the other side Jesus wants me to have a full life, a life with lasting significance.

You did not choose Me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit — fruit that will last.  John 15:16

This “fruit” is explained in the rest of John 15. The big thing for me is to know is life has a good purpose beyond the years of my existence an eternal purpose.

For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.  Ephesians 2:10

God has good things for me to do, so instead of “just killing time ‘till I die,” I want to follow Jesus, being filled with “living water” and flow like this stream — in the fullness of life.